Theatrical Thursday: Hobbitses

The best movie of 2012 was.... (like you don't know if you read the title) HOBBITSES!!!! (Are they good to eats?)

Rapture. Divine brilliance! People running around in New Zealand in fantastic costumes! Er, I mean Middle Earth.

I loved the way that they didn't screw it up! How often do you watch a movie and they deliver a line and you're like, "Why did they do that? The writer wrote the line the right way, who decided that it wasn't good enough? Huh? Who?" and then we want to string up whoever was so shockingly presumptive. Only we don't because we're civilized people who only string up ogres and orcs. We'd string up trolls too except that we couldn't possibly lift them.

I loved their special effects, loved their casting. (Thorin, run away with me!) Loved their accurate portrayals, but most of all and especially, LOVED THE MUSIC.

I wish wish wish it wasn't so graphic and terrifyingly suspenseful or I'd bring my kids. It was so brilliantly engaging, it didn't feel at all long in spite of being quite long, and coming out of the theater in an ice storm was kind of exciting, and humming the song for the next week, and then googling it again when I forgot so it would be in my head again because that song is a good thing. I want to write an entire book that feels like that song. And Thorin. Sigh. I'm buying this movie when it comes out, maybe the soundtrack too.

Any other opinions on best for 2012?

Theatrical Thursday: Two movies to miss

So, lately the movies have been hit or miss, who am I kidding? Mostly miss.

What is there to talk about regarding Dark Shadows?

It was dark, there were shadows, the end. Oh, and everything burned down! That was exciting. Seriously, it was beautifully designed, Tim Burton is, after all, a beautiful designer, but the plot was... I'm not sure what the plot was. Vampire comes back, brings back his family fortune and kill the witch. All right. The thing was that the Vampire was truly horrific, killing people because they're liars, thieves, or other imperfect things when he's a blood sucking murderer all the time. So the hero was too hypocritical to be sympathetic and the bad guy, the girl was actually really sad because she just loved him, and he didn't love her, and she didn't go around mass murdering people. Also, I have a hard time sympathizing with super rich people who are so condescending towards everyone else. And there was tons of ick. Superfluous, pointless ick. So, it was a miss for me although it was very pretty.

Theatrical Thursdays: Zac Efron, the good, the bad and the cheesy

Zac Efron

 Bad photo, but you get the idea. This is the guy who was in High School Musical, the show that was so cheesy and ridiculous from a distance that I avoided all the stuff with him in it, but then I accidentally watched Charlie St. Cloud, (in the bathtub which I do not recommend because it has creepy water scenes which you don't need when you're in the bathtub. Shiver.) and I really liked him. So, I rented all three HIgh school musicals and had a marathon. It's true, I was fast forwarding tons of the last movie, but I got some actual entertainment out of the song and dance stuff, not a whole lot of plot, but the basketball dancers? Fabulous! Like Glee only without the annoying trops (who am I kidding? High school musical invented the trops. Anyway). So I was excited to see the new movie, the one by the Notebook guy, The Lucky One, yeah. Here he is below, a 'serious' actor.

Man. I did not like him in this movie, except when he's wrestling with the kid, he's good wrestling with kids. I was convinced the girl was totally smitten but him? He's all, 'I am so gorgeous, you can't help yourself, so I'll have pity on you and let you touch me'. Not attractive. Oh well.

So, what's the verdict? Good, bad or cheesy?

Charlie St. Cloud: Above average
Highschool musical: Actually entertaining
The Lucky One: You're lucky if you miss this one.

Anyone see anything else with Zac Efron in it?

Theatrical Thursdays: in Time

in Time was a little bit like Robin Hood all, 'we are the 99' thing, so politically the timing was good. Other than that, Justin Timberlake? I still think of him as Britney Spear's boyfriend. It's like Marky Mark, who is not quite so Marky Mark, but it took at least five movies to get past that. I kept waiting for him to break out in his boyband moves, which would have been fun! Why don't they break out in dancing more often?

The girl with the big eyes had very big eyes. I liked it when she kept shooting people. That was funny. Why would shooting people be funny? Sounds terrible written out like that. Guess you had to be there.

Everything was very cinematically extreme, black against white with subtle gray, but not a lot of middle ground. You could probably say that about the whole movie. Rich people=bad. I think they were trying to draw a comparison to the way that monopolies control who lives and dies, health care maybe? but it was all a little too much. And. If you have the technology to live forever depending on how many digits are programmed into your arm, why would you have no other technological advancements whatsoever, except for narrower windshields. Seriously. One of the best thing about Real Steel was the green roof and the wind plants all over. Shows thought went into the thing.

So In Time was a solid okay movie where the girls all wore dresses. And Justin Timberlake did not break out in dance or song. Too bad.

theatrical Thursdays: Going Postal

By far the loveliest thing I've seen all year. Mezmerizing! Fascinating! A clacking good time!

And the clothes! Has anyone else been seduced by Terry Pratchett's discworld series?